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Feb 12th, 2024
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 Business travel and the wife
#8819537
03/17/23 02:28 PM
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 20,043
TurkeyHunter
OP
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OP
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 20,043 |
What is your experience?
Been traveling for many years. She’s understanding and supportive but it is challenging when getting home. She’s all bouncy and excited, wants to chat, tell me about any issues in the home I need to fix, plans she’s made for us on the weekend, ready to go out for dinner, get romantic, etc.
To be determined
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819546
03/17/23 02:49 PM
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,690
SherpaPhil
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Posts: 1,690 |
What exactly is the problem?
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819550
03/17/23 03:00 PM
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Joined: May 2009
Posts: 24,470
dkershen
Rev Dave
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Rev Dave
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 24,470 |
Business travel is exhausting. My wife eventually learned to give me a day to decompress before laying on all the honey-do's.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.www.NewHopeEquine.com - Health and Healing through Horses.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: dkershen]
#8819559
03/17/23 03:16 PM
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Joined: Aug 2021
Posts: 1,112
DukeCigars
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Business travel is exhausting. My wife eventually learned to give me a day to decompress before laying on all the honey-do's. I had to get mine on that page. I’ve been traveling half the year since before we met. She doesn’t get out and do anything while I’m gone, so the moment I’m home she’s ready to blast out the door and chat it up Turkey - especially with trade shows. A lot of times I get home and tell her I just need to relax a bit. Traveling alone is a whippin, but a lot of show weeks are late bar nights/early mornings. Usually I come home and relax a bit then we go get dinner and after a few beers I like to tell her everything, helps me recall a lot of the items I need to take action on
Car guy. Serial entrepreneur. Terrible golfer.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: dkershen]
#8819563
03/17/23 03:23 PM
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Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 19,422
Judd
#1 Creedmoor Fan
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#1 Creedmoor Fan
Joined: Jan 2009
Posts: 19,422 |
Business travel is exhausting. My wife eventually learned to give me a day to decompress before laying on all the honey-do's. Mine never learned...fortunately, my travel hasn't picked up post COVID. I've been on one day trip thus far this year...I'm not mad about it either.
Don't let your ears hear what your eyes didn't see, and don't let your mouth say what your heart doesn't feel
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819564
03/17/23 03:23 PM
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Joined: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,437
TLew
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I echo the sentiments already expressed. Two things I would add 1. Our wives put up with a lot of crap when we travel. Well, at least mine does because we have small kids. I may be whooped when I get home, but she is too. That may change when we enter a different season in life, but it's hard. 2. When you're gone all week, several weeks a month, it's hard to defend going out of town again on the weekend to the lease, on a fishing trip, etc. because the spouse has trouble differentiating it. Again, may be based on the season of life you're in but it's true in my house. The fun really starts when crap breaks while you're out of town 
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819565
03/17/23 03:23 PM
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Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 959
goosebuster
Tracker
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Tracker
Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 959 |
I've got 2 young kids at home, so when I get home from the road I try to give them a lot of attention, as well as the wife. I usually crash that first night pretty hard, then it is back to normal. She is used to it, not saying that she enjoys being solo mom while I am gone though.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819568
03/17/23 03:28 PM
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Joined: Aug 2021
Posts: 1,112
DukeCigars
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Thankfully I don’t have kids, but to TLew’s point about trying to get to the lease on the weekends…a lot of times I will take her with me out there. She likes being out in the woods, even if not hunting. Also thankfully I have customers out where my lease is, so I get a lot of weekday hunting in!
Car guy. Serial entrepreneur. Terrible golfer.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819570
03/17/23 03:33 PM
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Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,124
Black02z28
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Joined: Dec 2008
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I traveled 3 weeks out of the month for 10 months out of the year for about about 5-6 year stretch. My wife was a rockstar for me and she had two small childern in tow. Its not to say that there wasnt moments where there was stress but she didnt give me a ton of crap about it. I did do my best to take the boys off her hands when I got home so she could have her own time.
I also would have the grandparents come grab the boys on occasion and fly my wife out to some of the cooler places that I was at so we could have a weekend to ourselves. Most of the time I tried to keep it a suprise as much as I could.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819575
03/17/23 03:45 PM
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,074
Texas buckeye
THF Celebrity
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,074 |
I guess it depends on what the business travel is. Hard physical labor and i can see giving a day before wanting to go out…but traveling and doing the same thing you do in the office (or at home) then whats the issue?
I may have a different perspective than some on here, but when i got back from work travel, i was happy to reconnect and do whatever. Different stroke for different folks
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: SherpaPhil]
#8819577
03/17/23 03:51 PM
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 20,043
TurkeyHunter
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OP
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 20,043 |
What exactly is the problem? Nothing really. It was just a topic that others are echoing. Regarding something breaking. I hate that when away. Usually it’s an easy fix and no matter how you try to explain it can’t be fixed till you get back. I remember coming back from an overnight international flight to find all in the living room sleeping with every blanket and sleeping bag. The pilot light would sometimes go out. She knew how to light that but had unplugged the central heat by mistake. Just plugged it back in. House warm in 15 minutes.
To be determined
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: Texas buckeye]
#8819578
03/17/23 03:55 PM
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,690
SherpaPhil
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I guess it depends on what the business travel is. Hard physical labor and i can see giving a day before wanting to go out…but traveling and doing the same thing you do in the office (or at home) then whats the issue?
I may have a different perspective than some on here, but when i got back from work travel, i was happy to reconnect and do whatever. Different stroke for different folks Yea, my travel for work is a lot less stressful than when I'm in town. I get more sleep and usually come back feeling better than when I left, so its no problem to hit the ground running.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: dkershen]
#8819613
03/17/23 04:29 PM
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 29,177
TXHOGSLAYER
THF Celebrity
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Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 29,177 |
Business travel is exhausting. My wife eventually learned to give me a day to decompress before laying on all the honey-do's. I was traveling 3 days a week, 40+ weeks a year. I needed the evening that I returned just to decompress. The next day was always a home day so by mid morning I would be ready to go again. I am so thankful that I don’t do that anymore. Now it is about 10 nights a year or less.
LETS GO BRANDON
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819623
03/17/23 04:45 PM
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Joined: Nov 2022
Posts: 140
Bones72
Woodsman
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Woodsman
Joined: Nov 2022
Posts: 140 |
Try being gone a year at a shot. Then when you are at " home" throw in field problems, gunnery, staff duty, and stupid soldier issues, physical ailments from the job. My wife put up with a ton of crap.If they're good ones they'll understand, mine happens to be a great one. It's been 25 years now as of the 28th of February ( tried to do the 29th but she wasn't biting on that), thank God I retired in 2012.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819627
03/17/23 04:48 PM
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Joined: Aug 2012
Posts: 2,812
nak
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Joined: Aug 2012
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When we first got married, my wife never understood the need for downtime, because "travel is fun" her book, and she was sitting home bored while I was out partying at the bar every night.
About 6 years in, she changed jobs and the new job required visiting their remote locations...she only travels 4 - 5 times a year, but it took exactly 1 week long, multiple destination business trip and getting home from the airport at 1:00 AM Saturday morning. The light switch flipped and work travel is not longer contentious between us...she GETS IT now. She knows to leave me the F alone for a while when I get home and not to hit me with a big list of things to do, unless there is something really urgent.
I've thought about this and there could be a business opportunity here.
A Spousal Work Travel Bootcamp that you could sign your loved one up for. A week long whirlwind where every flight departed at 6:00 AM or landed after 11:00 PM, Summer travel in the southern US or Christmas travel in the NE, so they deal with families traveling and weather delays. At least one hotel along the way would not have a room for them. At least one hotel room with AC that makes a terrible noise, cycles every 10 minutes, and never gets the room comfortable. They will have to travel half the week with a very irritating person that has special dietary requirement and never hangs up the cell phone. Long meetings each day, with another 4 hours in trade show booth each evening. Mandatory dinner without time to go back to the hotel room to decompress. Throw in drinks one or two nights in a bad hotel lounge.
We all need to practice Whoa more.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819658
03/17/23 06:10 PM
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Joined: Dec 2020
Posts: 1,443
Sewer rat
Pro Tracker
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Joined: Dec 2020
Posts: 1,443 |
I have spent on average 150 nights a year away from home working and have for the past thirty years. I pretty much hate it and would not recommend it to anyone with a family. The only reason I keep doing it is the money is excellent and we have built our lives around that and my skills/education are very specialized and not really applicable to much else.
The issues you describe are very common. My wife spends the time I am gone cooped up in the house with the kids and is excited when I get home and wants to go do all kinds of things. Me on the other hand I just spent ten days working 15 hour days living in a motel eating food from all kinds of crappy places and I just want to be home and relax. Leaving the house is the last thing I want to do.
There really is no easy solution or answer. Find a different job if you can.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819663
03/17/23 06:18 PM
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Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 9,948
The Dude Abides
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 9,948 |
My wife travels with me on occasion. Especially if there are nice golf courses near by and an opportunity to expense them back to the company presents itself.
I am still looking for the perfect apron, one with reinforced knee areas would be perfect.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: nak]
#8819678
03/17/23 06:48 PM
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 20,043
TurkeyHunter
OP
THF Celebrity
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OP
THF Celebrity
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 20,043 |
When we first got married, my wife never understood the need for downtime, because "travel is fun" her book, and she was sitting home bored while I was out partying at the bar every night.
About 6 years in, she changed jobs and the new job required visiting their remote locations...she only travels 4 - 5 times a year, but it took exactly 1 week long, multiple destination business trip and getting home from the airport at 1:00 AM Saturday morning. The light switch flipped and work travel is not longer contentious between us...she GETS IT now. She knows to leave me the F alone for a while when I get home and not to hit me with a big list of things to do, unless there is something really urgent.
I've thought about this and there could be a business opportunity here.
A Spousal Work Travel Bootcamp that you could sign your loved one up for. A week long whirlwind where every flight departed at 6:00 AM or landed after 11:00 PM, Summer travel in the southern US or Christmas travel in the NE, so they deal with families traveling and weather delays. At least one hotel along the way would not have a room for them. At least one hotel room with AC that makes a terrible noise, cycles every 10 minutes, and never gets the room comfortable. They will have to travel half the week with a very irritating person that has special dietary requirement and never hangs up the cell phone. Long meetings each day, with another 4 hours in trade show booth each evening. Mandatory dinner without time to go back to the hotel room to decompress. Throw in drinks one or two nights in a bad hotel lounge.
The boot camp idea is funny and well thought out,
To be determined
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819714
03/17/23 07:47 PM
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 6,762
psycho0819
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 6,762 |
Been there myself. When I took my present job that requires a lot of travel there was certainly a period of adjustment. Our kid was so young that she never knew any different, Daddy just goes out of town for work now and again, always has.
The biggest drawback in my traveling so much for work is the way it's effected how I view traveling now. I cannot stand going on any kind of vacation and staying in a freaking hotel room. VRBO, AirBnB, cabins, etc are the only way I'll vacation anymore. I don't care for eating out when home or on vacation because it's all I do on the road. And, I've become extremely "destination orientated", as she calls it, when traveling for work or with the fam.. My goal when I start the truck is to get there, and when I leave it is to get home. It takes a mental effort for me to break out of that mindset sometimes. And, of course, me being gone so much means that when I'm home I become the "cool parent" since the wife is the rule enforcer when I'm gone.
There is a balance to be struck in all of it, with the right person. The biggest factor in all of it is trust though. Without trust there would be a whole other set of challenges to deal with.
Tolerance is the virtue of a man without conviction.
The end of the world began the day it was created, and life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819744
03/17/23 09:47 PM
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Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 22,809
BigPig
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Aug 2009
Posts: 22,809 |
My wife was the one that traveled for work. We would go weeks without sleeping in bed together, see each other in passing, hunting season was even worse. Did that for 4 years, it was great for her promoting and now she works from home. I think we both want her to go back to traveling
Wade Dews, REALTOR ® Rendon Realty, LLC Frontline Real Estate Team www.RendonRealty.comWadeDews@gmail.com 214-356-2410 Up to 1% for closing costs for First Responders & Veterans Proudly partnered with Assist The Officer Foundation https://atodallas.org/
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819748
03/17/23 10:07 PM
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Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 5,859
Lazyjack
THF Trophy Hunter
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THF Trophy Hunter
Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 5,859 |
My first work travel was in the 70s. Biggest challange was was after eating the only two joints available, all wanted for dinner at home was a ham sandwich.
If the 2nd amendment was written just to include guns for hunting, why is there not an amendment to protect fishing poles?
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819750
03/17/23 10:16 PM
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Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 10,682
DQ Kid
THF Celebrity
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THF Celebrity
Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 10,682 |
All of this and I'd say it's even worse with young kids and a wife working an 8-5 job as well.
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Re: Business travel and the wife
[Re: TurkeyHunter]
#8819827
03/18/23 01:05 AM
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Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 854
Shane431
Tracker
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Tracker
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 854 |
Traveling for work is like balancing a check book. When you’re away from home it’s the same as making withdrawals. When you’re home it’s the same as making deposits. Got to balance both so you have a happy marriage and a successful career. Also, the longer more successful you are at your job will allow you more discretion on how much time you spend at home.
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