Can I bring a friend? He'll just sit in the stand but won't shoot anything.

Yeah, right.

You mean I was supposed to set up my own stands?

Can you rub sun tan lotion on me?

That one may get you shot.

I know I already shot my buck, but I don't think I can hold back if a monster shows up!

"Oh, no thanks. Alcohol is a tool of the devil."

10. "I've tried marriage three times and it just isn't for me."

Anyone who has ever hunted with others on a lease knows full well how some guys manage to get thrown off their lease. With the start of gun season just a few weeks away, here again is my list of things to do or say that can bring your new lease membership to a premature end. My reasons for each one will be explained as feedback dictates.

And please, feel free to add your own for the benefit of those who need to hear them.

1. "Can I bring a friend and how many deer can he shoot?"

2. "Work days? I work on weekends."

3. "I have a (insert anything that can be used at the lease) but it's broken."

4. "I only take head shots with my 7mm mag."

5. "If you pick up some (whatever), I'll pay you back."

6. "I can't clean deer because the sight of blood makes me pass out."

7. "My mom never taught me how to cook."

8. "Practice? Heck, I can shoot a fly off a frogs butt at 200 yeards."

9. "Guys, I really wish I could stay around to help clean up but my wife is expecting me back."

10. "I've tried marriage three times and it just isn't for me."

Anyone who has ever hunted with others on a lease knows full well how some guys manage to get thrown off their lease. With the start of gun season just a few weeks away, here again is my list of things to do or say that can bring your new lease membership to a premature end. My reasons for each one will be explained as feedback dictates.

And please, feel free to add your own for the benefit of those who need to hear them.

1. "Can I bring a friend and how many deer can he shoot?"
We have rules that establish friends and family rules. They hunt with you and can shoot as many culls and does so long as they can tag them. No issue
2. "Work days? I work on weekends."
We have a group of 5 on our place that work weekends. No issue
3. "I have a (insert anything that can be used at the lease) but it's broken."
Tell em to bring it and we will fix it
4. "I only take head shots with my 7mm mag."
You lose it, it is your deer
5. "If you pick up some (whatever), I'll pay you back."
We do this all the time
6. "I can't clean deer because the sight of blood makes me pass out."
I have no issue cleaning deer for women and kids. If you are a man and hunt, deal with it

7. "My mom never taught me how to cook."
Buy the food and we can make a deal
8. "Practice? Heck, I can shoot a fly off a frogs butt at 200 yeards."
Refer to the Head shot comment

9. "Guys, I really wish I could stay around to help clean up but my wife is expecting me back."
I understand, sometimes my wife wants me back too.

10. "I've tried marriage three times and it just isn't for me."
Usually makes for good stories around the campfire

Just telling you what would get a person not invited back to the places I hunt.

Also:

"If you guys wouldn't mind turning the music off at 10:00, I'd like to hit the hay early."

On the flip side, nothing can encourage your buddies to hit the sack a little earlier than greeting them with a buck on your ATV rack as they're dragging themselves out of their morning sack.

I will say this, the next clown that brings a bunch of 4LOKO isn't coming back.